Can I Unsubscribe From Adulting?

[DAY 94 OF THE DEEP END PROJECT]

I am tired. 

I am cranky

I am so irritable.

 

I decided that for the last 30 days of this writing project, I’ll wake up at 5:30 am. 

I did not take into account that there’ll be a new puppy in the house. During summer. When schools are closed.

I feel so guilty saying this but this morning I wanted to return him back. Sorry Cleo. I am so glad you will never be able to read.

I remember, I clearly remember having this same exact thought on Day 4 of having my second one. 

It was so hard. 

 

The sleepless nights

Breastfeeding

Managing a toddler 

 

But it all passed. It got better. And then we went ahead and got a puppy.

Lol.

I know it will get this better too. He won’t be a puppy for long. He’ll get used to us and us to him. 

I know this. 

But today I wanted to unsubscribe from all of it. 

From Adulting. 

I wanted someone else to come in and say “go take a snack and then take a nap.”

No. Not past tense. 

 

I want someone else to take over and give directions.

“Go make your bed”

“Stop putting doggie treats in your nose”

“Take him out for potty, it’s been an hour”

 

As I write this, Cleo sleeps peacefully in his pen. He was so tired after his vet appointment that he didn’t even need my lap today. 

Poor kiddo. 4 days ago, he was with his mom and his brothers and sisters. Now he is here. Maybe he didn’t sign up for this. 

 

The crate training

The potty training

 

And all the things dogs in the wild don’t have to do.

I guess we are both tired today. Him and I.

I wanted to bury my face in his fur and I did. I can see the spot where I left a red lipstick mark on his soft brown fur. I know he won’t mind. 

We’ll try again tomorrow. 

Him and I. 

And Adulting and puppy-ing. All of it.

Signed,

A Tired Mom

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